Everyone's a hypocrite now (or, lessons from Minnesota)

First of all, congratulations to me for correctly predicting Al Franken's smashing election to the U.S. Senate nearly 23 months ago. I rule!!

But now, on to what we've learned from Minnesota's adventures in counting.

• Everyone thinks a recount is swell when the Secretary of State is of their political persuasion, and thinks it's a democracy-wrecking farce when they don't. Owen and the Freeper crowd talk of Franken stealing an election now, but oddly I don't recall such talk when Republican Katherine Harris was overseeing a certain ballot recount in Florida back in 2000. I'm sure they all think that was perfectly legitimate. Similarly, Democrats think Minnesota Secretary of State Mark Ritchie is a hero, but eight years ago thought Katherine Harris was a crook. Shut up. All of you are being Sore Losermans.

• That counting is so hard in this day and age is nearly laughable. Why are we still divining voter intent when we have technology in place that would allow these things to be avoided? Nobody loves an unfunded mandate, but it's time we require all states to use touch-screen methods of voting that result in the production of a paper ballot that a voter may then review before submitting it. While paper ballots may be needed for absentees or in case of malfunction, this move alone would eliminate any question about the intent of 99.95% of the people who are voting. Granted, I don't think voting on an optical scan ballot is all that hard, but apparently it's not idiotproof, as we're learning once again in Minnesota.

• Why conservatives are defending Norm Coleman is astounding to me. Their willingness to stand up for this RINO, former Dem mayor of St. Paul is curious given their track record of preferring to purify the breed instead of supporting candidates who can actually win. And Coleman is about as conservative as you be in Minnesota and still win statewide. Too bad they don't realize the same thing about Wisconsin.
  

• Any Supreme Court that requires the candidates' campaigns to participate in determining which ballots should be counted should be fired on the spot and replaced with sea monkeys or some other more intelligent form of life.

• The Secretary of State and the Canvassing Board deserve some credit for the transparency with which the recount has been conducted. That you can go to the Star Tribune website and review contested ballots for yourself is a vast improvement from what we saw in Florida eight years ago, or in the 2004 gubernatorial race in Washington.
  

• Conservatives will defend the qualifications of college dropouts like Scott Walker, but a guy with a Harvard diploma walks into the room and suddenly his intelligence is questioned because he can crack a joke. Franken's a lot more like Bill and Hillary Clinton, or Bobby Jindal, above-average students with average last names, and less like George W. Bush or Al Gore, who were average students with above-average last names.

• Republicans oppose provisional seating at their own peril. It only makes them look like hacks to disenfranchise the voters of Minnesota while Norm Coleman pursues whatever fruitless legal maneuvering he chooses to take on. Franken's been certified as the winner. He should be seated until such time as some court decertifies him.